I Can’t Go Out There!

By Burton Bumgarner
7 m, 8 w, 3 flexible (minimum with doubling: 2m, 3 w, 3 flexible)
Eldridge Plays and Musicals

This one-act comedy in four scenes chronicles the different stages of the stage. In elementary school, a frustrated teacher deals with stage fright while trying to direct young children in a play about jackrabbits and a mean old dog. In middle school, two students who’ve been cast as Romeo and Juliet realize that the play is a love story, and that kissing may be involved! In high school, a teacher is holding auditions for a production of “Anne of Green Gables.” Actors audition with a rather violent monologue from “Titus Andronicus,” a rap version of the soliloquy from “Julius Caesar,” a gothic version of Poe’s “The Raven.” In a community theater production the lead actor is missing and the understudy is totally unprepared for going on stage, recalling his elementary school role as a jackrabbit. Everyone --actors, wanna-be actors and audience members alike --will identify with these characters who are ready (or not!) to step out on stage.